A lesson of Ramadan

13 Jun

Dear earth,
How are you guys? Well, it’s always be like these. I lost my thoughts (well some people can say it’s just an existence) after my previous post in earlier this year.
‌Took so many months to just push myself to write again. I did had a lot of things to spill, I had so many great experiences to share. But then it just floated to somewhere without any realization. I don’t know what happen. To mention that “time” as reason sometimes sounds cliché but it’s. I drowned myself in these all fun (or too much fun) activities that somehow sometime can easily turn into boring stuffs. Working, parenting, household activity, traffic to work, sleepiness, charity activity, playing with daughter. Yes, sometimes these tiring-amazing things can lead into boredom (yet I can’t imagine how my wife’s day is). These stuffs turns me into a zombie, holding my fingers to type more words, blocking my eyes to read more words and pulled me out of my curiosity, intensity, to learn more, to try something’s new or even just to keep my mind’s sharp (practices).

‌Then I felt myself easily tired, uneasy to focus, sleepy, hungry, degrading hearing ability, white hairs flooding and spreading in my head like they just doing the binary fusion every second. I realize that this made me really hard to concentrate, especially in a discussion, especially to understand, to react and answer people’s question.
‌As it started become a desperation, I tried to keep myself steady by surfing through the social media and playing the video games. The fact that’s not helping me either and I should’ve just blame those and not to blame the time. But in the end I probably would scream that what I really need is just time, more time. LOL

‌Ah yeah that’s just the prologue of my post anyway. The bottom line is I’m running out of time to study, learn and write. Instead of to use my time efficiently, I’d rather to waste it with games and social media. LOL

‌So it’s already reach the mid-year. As reflection, I haven’t do anything worth, I even can’t match how my last year’s struggling activity. And now already Ramadan (well because I’m late to execute this, it’s almost in the end of Ramadan), the holy month for moslem. A month where moslem told to battle themselves as they had to fast for a day (no eat, no drink), limit their anger, hold their sexual desires, locked out their negativity thoughts and bad words.

‌Physically, we are handicap. Emotionally, we are restricted. At this condition, I always think that we were told to feels and emphasis how animal’s live. When we can’t pass this challenges and test, we are the same like the animal, or even worse.
‌Another point is, we were told to realize how to limit the unlimited things in a complete human, physically and psychologically. Those two actually can sort what we need and what we want but sometimes it easy to blur also. As example, when we are breaking the fast, our stomach may easily full with just small amount food. Though that small amount are never enough for us in a normal ordinary day without fasting. Our body sort things that really important and tells our mind to stop eat the unnecessary. But sometime we are just a greedy and end it up by trying to eat as much as we want and we eat till death.
‌How’s my Ramadan? Quite ok. So far I just have to battle myself more to the sleepiness. Since I wasn’t sleeping at all after the sahur. And this sleepiness is a test when you have to ride motorbike for hours. This year’s less physical work, no fieldwork. 3 years ago I had to deal with illness for some weeks, in the middle of fieldwork too. Thought that I will be safe from that, the fact I got diarrhea just almost in the end of Ramadan. Like last year I had to do the fasting during the fieldwork (well it’s just a couple day, but I was quite weak for sure)

Besides that, I do experience a new thing, such as babysitting a 17 months old daughter that really a test of patient. She runs, cries, plays, she’s not easy to be fed.
‌The other problem is I don’t know why I can’t force myself to do the table work. This brain is just failed to work on write and read activity.  Another interesting part is, I tried to minimize all toxic thoughts that usually were easily spread in your circle. I start to unfollow some toxic person, I even block some of them too.. I feel relieve, I find my peace, finally it’s a good choice.

‌ Too bad that it’s almost reach the end of Ramadan. I learn that after all these years, sometimes we have to limit our unlimited, especially desire. We really have to sort things that we really need before it fulfill our tank too much  and stuck, or before we turn into a greedy bastards. Sometimes we just have to fast and not randomly eat anything. As like last year I succeed to run many things, but then this year I can’t even match the same goals and level. Perhaps it’s a downgrade, but probably I also don’t need that too much. And by fasting, perhaps I can get a complete better proportion of living. I just realized that it’s sad to shut down my charity program for uncertain time, it’s sad to limit my other charity activity, it’s sad to hold my productivity as it may good for my body and mental health, it may good for my family (family time, yeah!), though it’s arguably too for my satisfaction itself.

‌well at least a new thing learnt by this year’s Ramadan. Hopefully.

‌hoping to see Ramadan again next year, as i might learn new things again.

happy Ramadan, we will celebrate our victory in Eidul fitri soon.

See you all again in the next post soon.




Palu Trip : ConsCamp and Refresh!

6 Feb

Actually since last year, my eyes aimed on an interesting status on Facebook, stated by someone from a conservation community called Tambora Muda and probably it would sound more and less just like this:

What if someday we gather in someplace, independently, to share many things in conservation as a moment for capacity building and knowledge transfer? Would it be interesting?

Then couple weeks later, there was the announcement of the annual Tambora Muda’s Conservation Camp. It would be held in Palu, Central Sulawesi, at 9-20 January 2018. Of course it’s an interesting event to join. But then to see the schedule and location made me think twice, it’s impossible for me.


Speaking about Tambora Muda community, this is a growing community for young researchers and young practitioners in Indonesia biodiversity conservation. Established in December 2015, I was following their activity by their monthly bulletin, “Erupsi”. Though their activity are easily can found in many kind of social medias.


I was curios about this community, most of the people, the contents, the activities are in the same disciplines such as biology or forestry and less people and issues that related to wildlife medicine, or even conservation medicine.  The fact that I’m a veterinarian who work in conservation, and really believe that conservation effort should run by various disciplines, also veterinary medicine has important roles in conservation biology (some people don’t know about this actually).  At least there are 3 things that related between veterinary medicine and conservation biology, (1) participation in wildlife capture and immobilization, (2) leadership or assistance in addressing wildlife health issues, and (3) leadership or assistance in addressing wildlife disease issues, including using wildlife as sentinels to identify new and emerging diseases or epidemics of old diseases. So those led me to email them and asked about it. Yet they revealed that actually there’s only one veterinarian actively involved and contributed in the community. Then the email became a longer conversation about their interest to ask me to  share my perspectives in their Conservation Camp event. This was a game changer.

Then the invitation letter reached me. I discussed it with my superior about the possibilities, start with a permit to leave my works for couple days and sponsor for the event. In the beginning, it’s not easy to convince that this is gonna be something with good impact to the organization. But in the end, I got the permit and sponsorship. So yess!

My class schedule was arranged on 18 January. So I decided to depart one day earlier. I chose a bad flight which was very early in the morning like 02.30 am. The problem was, the last shuttle bus to Soekarno-Hatta airport from Bogor was at 8 or 8.30 pm. Yet I got to work until 4 pm and reached the house almost 6 pm. I hadn’t packed my goods, just finished my presentation couple hours before. Luckily everything sets on time, though I had to change my pants first just a moment before I left to the bus terminal. I ripped it just in attempt to ride the ojek (damn!).

Thought that the journey to the airport would takes more hours, the fact it just around an hour. Well I got plenty hours stranded in the airport before boarding time. The hardest part was, staying alive from this boredom and sleepiness. Well then everything went smooth in the airplane, took off and flied. Bit turbulence couple minutes before landed, but yeah, everything’s ok. I finally back again in this Sulawesi island. I did spent some years during my childhood in Makassar, 2 years ago I visited Manado and now Palu.


sunrise view from a plane, above the sky, ready to land

Actually at that day there were also 2 speakers of the Conservation Camp who arrived. But they were couple hours after me. So I decided to call my friends for a short meet, before 10 am, which was the the meeting time between me, 2 other speakers and the committee. Yeah I met Faqih, who actually was my classmate during in the university and her wife also our junior colleague . Had breakfast, shower, some short chat with the guys and also Fadhil, their son, then I straight to the meeting point and left to Lore Lindu National Park.

The 2 remaining speakers were Satrio and Sephy. Satrio would talk about peat swamp habitat and its complex in conservation. He is WRI (World Research Institute) representative, very smart, spent his whole higher education in USA, a Ph.D. and younger than me (LOL)! The other one is Sephy. Nope, it’s a gentleman (remember to not judge a book by its cover?). He is a bat researcher would give a long session about bat studies, quite veterant (he is older than me, haha), has so much same interests like me, he’s cool yo.

Took like almost 2 hours to the national park, we stop in Tambing Lake, where the Conservation Camp of Tambora Muda was held. Spotted some familiar face like Nathan the reptile boy and Billy from Tasikoki rescue center. Met Marsya who emailed me earlier about this event. So the Tambing Lake is actually a tourism object in Lore Lindu National Park. The committee set the camp in its camping ground but then they decided to move some people to a hall nearby due the unfriendly weather. It’s cold, it’s in the mountain area. The fact that the place has just finished for some renovations due the big earthquake last year, but the place looked good, neat and quite clean (when less people come). Nathan said there were no reptile found during his surveys and some birds easy to spot.


Anyway on the first night, Sephy started his long session about bat studies, but the electricity went bad and made the class bit uncomfortable to follow. He also tried to apply a trap to capture the bat, but zero result that night. Yet I was very tired..I only slept like 2-3 hours and I wasn’t sure i could sleep well in the new place and cold like that. I went sleep with a big concern..what if the electricity failed again during my presentation (I still applied my “no laptop during conference or workshop policy”).

With the time difference there, I awake just like my biological hours, though it still bit dark, and no one else. Quite fresh after the sleep and a bit confident for my talk that day. I, Billy and Sephy talked about the electricity disturbance that might become a trouble for us. Luckily the committee asked the national park officer to check our generator and tried to fix it. Then the generator back to work again, electricity went on again. Then the committee asked me to do presentation before lunch. Considering the unstable power, so I said yes in the first time.

Well my talk was titled Conservation Medicine Practice. I tried to share perspective about conservation medicine.

1But before reached punchline, I tried to introduce to the participants about veterinarian, the works of veterinarian and talking about the animal health, I mentioned about zoonosis.


Shared some cases of zoonosis that exist in Indonesia and could spread with in the conservationist fieldwork. I told’em about how important biosecurity in our works is.


I pointed many things that could influence the spread of the disease and it ended in how we treat people, animal and our environment as one connection. That is a concept that sounded lately and known as one health concept.


As a punchline, I continued to explain about one emerging discipline that preserve the one health concept, which is the conservation medicine. Most literature define conservation medicine as an emerging , interdisciplinary field that studies the relationship between human, animal health and environmental condition.  But then I just knew that there is a misunderstanding of  conservation medicine definition in Indonesia, which become quite similar to wildlife veterinary medicine.


I don’t agree with the Indonesian terms, as I always believe that animal health, human and environmental are connected in one link and studied through many kind of discipline aspects. After defined the conservation medicine’s term, I did share some cases of wildlife disease outbreak and tried to explain in conservation medicine’s perspective.


As a closing, I played some videos of my works in IAR Indonesia (commercial breaks! :p). How bout the feedback? Quite impressing actually. At least around 3-4 person asked some questions related to animal welfare. Great feedback then!


What made me happier after the presentation went smooth was I joined the bat session again. That night we succeed to apply the mist nets and also the harps trap the morning after. We got a bat! No, we got bats!!

So then after the bat successfully captured, we put in bag and straight to hall for the examination. Here participants learned how to handle the bats, tried to identify the species and the sex, did morphometric, body weight measured and collected some ectoparasites (that’s my request actually!) Not every participants had deal with wildlife directly, so bit acceptable that some of them were too excited with the animal. But I warned many times to not point too much light or flash to the animals, to not touch them recklessly, or waste time too long for the handle.

For the biosecurity issues also bit concerning, since we don’t used proper minimum protection, the committee didn’t provide it too, so I hope in the future they would considered about this. But i appreciate how the guys were trying their best to run and set the stuff, thumbs up!

Well actually my flight was in 20th, but I decided to left in 19th.  I would leave the camp later on afternoon, but that the remaining speakers apparently had to fly back in the afternoon, so we had to left earlier together.

While the others quite in a rush to catch the flight, but at least we could hangout and took some pictures in some good spot in the seaside, in Palu. We also had spare time to shop souvenirs!


Then after the others flew, I decided to spent a night in Faqih’s house. But before stop in his house, I and the generous Fahri (PIC for pick-up, he was very welcome with our will and love to help us to take a picture!) had another sightseeing in the city, to the Tadulako University and visited the Nosarara Nosabatutu Monument, the peace monument of Poso’s conflict.


Tried to get the feels of the monument. It’s always hard for us to build this country, especially when we waste too much times and lives for intern conflict like this 😦 ..Anyway the place itself had very beautiful scenery, since it was on the high land. There you can spot great scenery of Palu when mountain meets seaside from the top view. This city is beautiful for sure!


Well then to end the night Faqih brought me to eat the Kaledo! The Palu’s dish! Basically beef and their bones, cooked like a soup. Quite light broth and seasoning, but tasty!

On to the next day, which was my last day in Palu. I woke very late, exhausted for the jetlag and tiredness from couple days before. Then Faqih, me and Fadhil had Palu’s breakfast style. Eating Putu with duo and Nasi Kuning in the beach while watching the sea.

Unfortunately it’s rain and we left earlier to his house. Then I packed my stuff and then ready to the airport. But before that, we went to eat Utadada. It’s just like a chicken in white curry and served with ketupat, we ordered the roasted chicken too and it all so tasty!! Really a great dish to end my journey in Palu.

So much refreshing for the journey, the food, the people, and ConsCamp was a great event. Too bad I couldn’t join for the whole event. Very glad and happy to see Faqih, Lia and their son, Fadhil. Thank you very much guys! Much appreciate for Marsya, Shera and the gank for this opportunity. Not forget to mention the generous Fahri who’d welcome to accompany me for short moment in Palu. Palu is a beautiful city for sure, their foods are outstanding too!

Gate 2017 almost Closed, Proceed to the Gate 2018

31 Dec



Why things feels rolls so fast?just like a blink of an eye and suddenly it’s almost reach the end of year 2017..Suddenly it’s already reach my 2nd year of marriage with a daughter that already turns 1 year old and my family already stay in Bogor for more than a year…

Feels like I missed all of the moments that were happen during this whole year. I feel like missed all of the event in a blink of eye. I feels like I waste so many times, but in the fact I did so many things. Some were standard, some were just left out and some were just a milestone. Some were happy, fun and exciting, but sad and sorrow also complete it too.

In general, things in 2017 were mostly mean and harsh, uncomfortable. People tends so hype at religion, they’re become fanatic, but then forget what religion are for. Most of them become morale police and thank God internet, they spread so fast like an outbreak. People you known before are changing. aggressive, hateful, self-righteous and love to judge in the name of religion. Some of them are actually insecure for their state of obedience, therefore they start to seek other’s privacy just to be told a better person. Thank God again with the internet, these people become so vocal in social media.


Actually this first happen because of the polarization of political atmosphere and their the religion sentiment took place to shake your faith and common sense. logical fallacy, hoax, double standard, made people lost somewhere. No matter how high they enroll their education.


That’s also a golden moment for some cults to penetrate the society such as, flat earth community, anti-vaccine, racist, terrorism, etc.

While the capitalism harvesting the hype too. Then people start to block one to another just because a different preference and it’s happen to me too. Time wasted as more just annoying debate and it’s not a discussion at all. So social media less fun nowadays. Well it’s a self-note to myself when I got irritated with people who boldly think different,  some of them would feel the same like me and pissed. I always try to keep in mind that is normal to have different interest, but don’t let it lead into an ignorance, intolerance, friction and ruined your relationship. Especially with those who had good relation  before. So sometime with those kind of consideration, I tried to hold my opinion to be post, though it’s feels like an apathy. There are a lot of bigger things to fight actually.


You still see how cruelty still happen in animal, you still see how wildlife crime still happen. The fact that it can affect our healthy environment and our healthy state, it affect how we treat the marginals and it also affect us in the way to afford the social justice in society.  As Gandhi said the greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated and it also can be related in one health concept.


“The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated.” – Gandhi


While in the other parts of the world, there’s  a stupid person who apparently has super power and doesn’t care about climate change (he doesn’t even think it’s exist!!) as the matter of his money. This is a huge problem for at least in the next  4 years, if it not gone too far and bigger.



I keep remind that we, human,  are responsible for anything in the past, present and the future. So yeah, I still stay and struggle to take care what the almighty has gave us. To become a small part of the mother earth protector. In the whole year, I tried to save the wildlife, promote their welfare, in this case are slow lorises and macaques. I tried to change my way of life slowly. I tried to spread the awareness slowly too, start with my family, especially my daughter, who will become our better hope for the future.


Sadness will always complete your day, to make you stay sane, though sometime it depressed you and drive the insanity. That also happened to me this year. Started with cheesy things like my broken laptop, broken phone, broken motorbike, and other things.


Continued with how barely I almost failed to survive myself and family everyday was. How some close people still  disturb my comfort zone was. How learning through an experience was such as marriage and parenting are quite stressful and exhausting. How your professional works not good enough for a better result were.  Not enough just that, I lost some friends around the mid of this year. A buddy back in the university, one of  funniest person, died earlier in young age due to his illness. Felt sad, since I couldn’t come to his wedding, couple months before. Another one, my childhood friend, who ended her life by suicide after drowned by her sorrow. Also not forget to mention about the lost of our cat, Doraemon. Well he just a stray cats that often stayed at our house for almost a year. We first met him since the earlier day we live in this house. Then we decided to start a spay and neuter project for stray cats in our neighborhood and he was the 2nd cats. Since that time, he was more attached to us. As he also the first cat that we introduced to Gemi and they quite along. His calm attitude really friendly for children, no matter how rough the touch of Gemi was. But he got older, then he was gone like couple weeks and come back but then looked so much ill until a week after he disappear forever.

Another lost also for us in the clinic, we rescued an injured cat and treated him. One of his hind leg got necrotic and we had to do the amputation. We called him Utut aka toothless. After that he become a resident cat with a lovely attitude. But  couple weeks ago he died by a venomous snake bite.


I don’t know if those things mentioned above also affect my health state and fitness. But as a highlight of this year, I felt like so easy to be ill, easy to be tired and exhausted. I got like almost 8 influenza this year, even though only half of it that made me really drop. But it’s difficult for my body also to get recover after the illness. It took almost 2 weeks to get well after a flu and it’s has to be help by antibiotic. I once had almost 3 months of dry cough after a flu. The worst one, I had an hemorraghic- keratoconjuctivitis with influenza a few weeks ago.


The fact that i just recovered from an influenza before the eye infection. I tried to change my diet, I didn’t had a frequent work-out since I was too tired for the works. My belly was getting bigger, more hair turns to white, easy to get exhausted. I’m getting older in this 31 years of my life. My body seems almost give up..Then my wife started to worry. She keeps tell me to not die earlier…

Well, those are my problem during this year. How about my productivity ? I failed to produce any paper for a scientific journal, but I did make 2 papers for 2 conferences. 1 oral presentation for the conference and it’s the ASCM! I did it again!

I also gave a class about conservation medicine to vet students in Padjadjaran University, Bandung.

That was fun! As a milestone, this year I think I did so many surgeries, more than last year. I did surgeries in my work place (mostly dental surgeries in primates, vasectomy-castration in primates and spay/neuter cat).  I did also some in my house (spay/neuter for stray cats). Before I never want to do any surgeries and mostly I only assisted the surgeon for anesthesia monitoring. So yeah, I did it!finally

This year I got less fieldwork duty, it’s just 1 trip of slow loris release and 1 trip of supervised slow loris in one of our rescue shelter in Malang.

In contrary for my state of health, I did really great physical effort during the release work. It’s on Ramadhan and I survived the day in fasting eventhough I walked for so many kilos in quite bad ass track!


though it’s not too often going outside but at present I easily got homesick, especially when I miss my daughter..So I guess I’m not as strong as it used to be….


What makes me happy for this year? Well me and my family still survive and happily ever after. My daughter getting bigger, my wife quite adapt for her role as a mother and housewives, our parents are healthy and happy too.

I was happy to join the ASCM again.

IMG_20171114_182930_239 The bottom line is I’m happy no matter some bad things happen to me or my family, since we still alive and in every worst stage of my life, I believe that there’s someone else with worse condition. That’s why I should always feel thankful and happy for that.

Some goals were failed at this year but again, there’s still a chance for next year. I just have to trying harder, or probably my target are just too high, so I may drop my standard a lil’ bit.

For next year, I plan some things that hopefully I could done. More scientific publication (especially the international one!), participate in ASCM again and start to aim it diploma maybe, involve with a different community just for the sake of conservation, run more frequent and consistent surgeries with better standard and result, involve more with student to share my knowledge, work hard to gain more money for D’alton Project, to be a better husband and father and trying to stay alive as long as ever just like what my wife asked.

Well just in couple hours the 2017 gate will be close, and another gate will be open. it’s 2018 and let’s get it on!

We spend the new year’s eve at home again, the baby girl is already sleep, we had a great dinner and to wait until the year’s change we already got supplies of Hok Lo Pan and Martabak! Enjoy your new year’s eve everybody! Keep in faith!


ASCM 2017 : I Did It There!

28 Dec


After 2 months! Finally I get the time to make this! At least before the year change, I have to post it!! (Well if you read it after 2017 already past, the I fail again!)

Asian Society of Conservation Medicine (ASCM) is a great networking group of vets (mostly wildlife or zoo vets) in Asia and it really has a great relationship with me. Professionally and emotionally too. Previously they were known as Asian Zoo/Wildlife Medicine and Conservation.


In 2008, they held the conference in Bogor, Indonesia and that was my first participation in the event. I was in the university and joined with my friends to go there, supported by our seniors. We presented a poster about our activity in sea turtle’s basic observation there.


Then time flew, in 2012, I participated again in their event in Thailand, at that time they already changed their name into Asian Society of Zoo and Wildlife Medicine. I was presenting 2 oral presentations and 1 poster presentation. That was my first time experience to travel abroad. Very emotional for sure, since I came as my organization’s representation but minimum  support and appreciation. So my parents funded me (yeaay!), then I also share fund to my junior who her theses and research were funded by me since her paper accepted for poster presentation there.



A year later I attended the conference again in Singapore, this time I worked very hard to find a fund. I made it in the last minute. But then I messed up with the presentations. Lousy topic, lousy presentation and preparation..But i had a great experience in their post conference workshop, the reptile endoscopy.

But then i never expected that it’s my last time participation with the society. Until 4 years later….


Well this year, the conference was held in Kuching. I tried very hard to work a paper to submit. Nothing wrong with paper, though it’s not a perfect paper and cheesy topics. But it’s a compilation of record of clinical findings in our Javan slow loris post-release activity, I have to look so many data and stuff. However the problem it’s not only that. Four years in absent of this conference, many things has changed. We have to register and submit the paper online, including to complete the payment first so we can get a validation for the account registration. Well I’m kinda short and still trying to look for fund and to get a fund at least you have to show the acceptance of any kind presentation (well this is as my standard). To send any paper you need to have the registration’s account, means I almost in the dead end, until Alice (the secretary) really help me with an access to on spot registration form. So I could send my paper, then I have to wait couple weeks until my paper accepted to be presented. Surprisingly a week after the submission, I got an email for my paper’s revision. In my entire history of this conference, this is my first time to get a revision order. Even I already tried to review it to many people first. I mean, this probably was my best paper so far. Again, things change in 4 years. Sometime when I tried to review my old papers, it just feels like rubbish. But when I submitted in the couple previous similar conference, no revision at all! LOL!

Anyway my paper got accepted for the oral presentation in almost late time, I succeed for the fund and finally I could attend the conference again!!yeyeyeyeyyeyeye…..!!

I tried to prepare many things. Got my funds and cashed it, finished my presentation and reviewed it to many people and revised it again after so many good inputs. Charts, pictures, videos and then I practiced the presentation also. and revised again until I really satisfy and confident enough for my presentation. I had to finish everything before left to Kuching, I have to make sure everything well prepare so I could just enjoy the event there without being distracted by any other thing. For other reason is, my laptop was already broken, I couldn’t afford the new one and didn’t planning to bring any other. So it’s my first conference experience without any laptop.


Anyway, I reached Kuching after flew from Jakarta then transit in Pontianak. I slept less than 3 hours the night before, left my house at 3 a.m. to catch the flight at 8am (Jakarta’s traffic really absurd, so you better move earlier). Things was okay with the flight, I transit in Pontianak and met with work-mate there and stepped in Kuching on time. But the problem, I was very hungry. The last time I ate was at 2 a.m. and it’s already 3 p.m.! Luckily I could find the nearest McDonald’s.


dododododoo..I’m lovin’ it! it’s cheaper than in Indonesia!

I was exhausted, sleepy and hungry. So yeah, I survived for lunch then at dinner I joined my friends near the riverside.


not bad for a small room in a hostel




Kuching statue :p

So the ASCM meeting was held at 20-22 October 2017. 21-22 October was the conference and a day before they ran some pre-conference workshops, USG on small mammals and wildlife pathology and forensic. I joined the wildlife pathology and forensic workshop. And here I told you a stupid story of me…When go abroad, of course internet network is a problem, unless you had the local SIM card. So at very near the workshop day, the announcement spread by email. It contains of schedule and meeting point. Since the workshop place located in a far-faraway place in state veterinary lab, then from that place, we would move to the conference’s place (which is in another faraway hotel from the city). The email didn’t reach me (well actually it did, but in my other email and why the fuck my phone didn’t notify me ??!). Well but it’s okay. Since I wake very early and planned to met my workmate at 7 in her hotel then decide where we should go. Eventually and accidentally I met the workshop’s lecturer during my way to my friend’s hotel. His name was Chia-Da Hsu, I remember him since my manager already showed his Facebook account and we did communicated by email before. So, he told me that workshop will start at 9am, the meeting point was in my friend’s hotel and the shuttle would be left at 7.30 (for the lecturer) and 8 for the participants (It’s my first time to meet him and it’s awkward).. In the hotel I saw so many people already put their belonging to the mini bus. But here I started my stupidity again. 1, I straight to the lobby to wait until the actual time while I await my friend ready. 2, I didn’t ask anyone again there soon, even I met some familiar faces back from 4 years ago. Then until time was running out, people gone, hotel seem quiet and I ask the hotel’s staff who apparently didn’t know anything about the ASCM and what made it so perfect is, my friend hadn’t show up from her room….Then I met another familiar face which is Junpei Kimura, who is the general secretary of ASCM, I asked about the shuttle bus stuff to the workshop place. Then he just shocked and told me that they already left several minutes ago! ( and I was  just so fucked up.yeah). Luckily he ran outside and stop the remaining committee and there were Takuma Yanai (the head of ASCM’s senior board) and Alice Lau (the secretary, who correspondent with me all time since my registration trouble, included to ask her for extra person in the workshop for my workmate). Yeah, it’s an awkward first meeting and very great impression. Alice bit upset for me, since she saw me at the first time I reached the hotel. And my excuse is, I waited for my friend. Without wasting for more time, we just carry on to the destination. But just we turned to other way and passed the hotel, I saw my friend walked in relax. So I asked them to stop, to wait for her. And finally after all those shitty things, we hit the pedal to the workshop place. I was very embarrassed for this and here we are the stereotypical Indonesia, the late people..The journey seems awkward too because I didn’t have any topic to talk, but I’m amazed to see how my friend looked cool and innocent….The morale lesson is, don’t hesitate to ask anyone ASAP and be selfish.

We arrived on time in the state veterinary lab and straight to registration (luckily, yet I still felt very ashamed). I finished my payment then continued to the class. The workshop was started with introduction of every participants as ice breaking. After that we had some theories like general wildlife pathology, general veterinary forensic, and general guideline of necropsy photography.


Then we break for lunch and then heading to the wet lab for a necropsy practice. We were divided in couple groups and got 3 different animals for necropsy practice; turtle, bird and a mammal (at that time my group had a slow loris carcass!yeay!!). Well basically for the mammal and it’s in a slow loris, had no  different than the way that I did in my place. But seriously, Chia-Da performed and teach the better and neat procedures of necropsy. As he could presented and exposed the organs very clear, so we could see the anomaly of the carcass easily.  By his way. I could see more critical points of examination than the way I used to do.. This is very enriching for sure!

After the workshop done, we were wait for bus pick-up to Damai resort where the conference would be held a day later. I was very exhausted since in the last two days, I just slept not even more than 6 hours. I just overslept on the way to the hotel. It almost 1,5 hours and the traffic quite jam.

Touched down the hotel, straight to the lobby for check in, then another problem popped out. Because of my clumsiness to state out my flight’s schedule, the hotel got confused for my reservation eventhough I already stated the actual plan and booking date. I should have just stay for 3 nights, but the hotel charged me for 5 nights.And it’s my office and donor money. Great!So I just skipped it first, since I was tired, probably the jetlag stuff still bother me, and I was hungry for sure. The fact that the hotel looked so isolated from the civilization and the hotel’s meals were expensive. The WiFi was sucks also, so I went out to the lobby again after spent couple minute in the fancy room.


Fancy and big room huh!

I met Sumita who’s the wife of Reuben, the local chairman of the conference. She said there were free dinner in the bar as the welcome party of participants. Hell yeah, dinner time! So I ate and socialized with old faces! Woaaaw….this is so good..after 4 years, I could meet these people again! And I did make sure eat a lot as I didn’t want to get starving.

Remember my mission to not bother my presentation anymore after I finished it? Well I failed, I got some mistakes issues on my slide of presentation when I was practicing it with my phone. So I borrowed my friend’s laptop to review and revised it again. The fact that nothing wrong happen, it’s just stupid things appear in a different device, but I then changed some color’s font to make it looked well. Then I went to sleep to recover my energy.


Awake in the D-day earlier. I decided to walk around the hotel as it has beach and seaside view.


Hang out at the lobby for WiFi (seriously the WiFi so sucks, as I had to connect to the hotel’s admin network in lobby area for internet). Met Junpei again. Talked about how the organization of ASCM improved, how it goes for the yesterday’s workshop and how it would goes for the conference. As more people appeared in the restaurant for breakfast, I decided to go back to my room, took a bath, change my clothes and straight for breakfast. There then I met the rest of Indonesian participants. So in total it should be about 7 Indonesian. Me and Uwi from the IAR Indonesia, 2 persons (Rico and Pandu) from OIC and SOCP, Prof. Bambang from IPB,  dr. Kadek from Udayana Universities and not forget to mention Lina, my former partner in Kalaweit who become a student of Seoul University at present.


Endonesa!endonesa!! –>Indonesian contingent minus Dr. Kadek

The conference started! I was so nervous, I really cautious for everything. Started with earlier presentation submit to the committee.

Set the folder very neat with all of the video attachment there. Then just couple minute before my session started, I did the double check to make sure that the presentation was okay. Well my session was started after the second coffee break, which was around 3 p.m. I had plenty time to relax, enjoy the other session and presentation.


To be honest, the conference run very well and quite smooth. Set on time, the session divided very fair and in a good arrangement with so many interesting topics. The food were great too… I was glad that i could alive during the conference without losing glucose or even caffeine support to my brain and eyes..but then the time was getting closer to my show time…

It’s my turn to give the talk! I was so nervous, my voice was trembling, the tone sounded loss of pitch, I was a bit shaking.. I tried to make it more comfy by throwing some interactions between the audiences, yet it succeed so I started to gain for more confident. My slide went smooth, the video played successfully, although I pressed the wrong button. But then there was a disturbance, I did edited one slide since the font’s color not too clear, but in the end the words just gone! Luckily I wasn’t that panic, so I could finish it until the end of the presentation. During the discussion, there was only one person who asked some questions, but then the questions almost out of the context. So this is quite confusing me whether people really understand or not. LOL! But finally, I did my presentation again there! With a better topic, better execution and this is so relieving! After many months of preparation, stressful works and so many blocks…pheew…


After the presentation, I straight to the lobby again. Then the hotel had a good policy about the reservation mistake. They would refund the rest of the day in cash, later after I checked out! Thank god!

So I was very happy and relaxed. Spent the day by hang out with other Indonesian fellow then prepared myself for the gala dinner. So I took a bath then gathered with other people. I sit in a round table with some of Indonesian and the rest were the Singapore zoo guys and OPCF Hongkong.


they drunk as hell for sure!

Then people started to drunk and we, the Indonesian were bored after finished the meals. So we left the place earlier and took a walk to the outside, the civilization. Apparently there was a small path connected to the world. There was a hostel there, with cheaper price! Around the hostel, there was a food court and 711! Gosh! I should’ve stay there! So yeah, we bought some stuff like snack and ice cream in the 711, then hang out in one of our room. Had some chat and joke. Then we split back to our room for rest.


we are young!

Well at the second day, I already felt calm. Just enjoy the rest of the session. But also talked with some other people about the next year conference that would be held in Bali. I tried to connect the board and the local organizer with the Indonesian Wildlife Vet Association, as I am one of the junior board there. Hopefully they would considered my idea. Then after session by session, the conference reached it end. At the closing ceremony there were also announcement for best oral and best poster presentation also the winner of photo contest. Amazingly Indonesian participants won the best oral presentation and 2nd place of photo contest! But too bad it’s not me, LOL!I should worked it harder next time.

bit weird to see these two people win the competition LOL!

After the announcement, we had a big photo session together with all of the participants then continued with closing ice breaker in the bar. Alcohol again, so most of the Indonesian stayed outside the bar, some were smoking, and some just enjoy the rain. We asked for non-alcohol drink, but the bar almost charged us. Luckily in the end, we got a free non-alcohol juice..yessss! After the rain stop, all of the Indonesian decided to walk to the food court outside or dinner then again continued with chit-chat and snack in the same room like the day before.


The last day in the hotel, me, Uwi, Pandu and Rico decided to travel around the town. So we planned to check out from the hotel around 10, after the breakfast. During breakfast we meet some guys who prepared their diploma exam. Yes, the ASCM also arranged a diploma program of conservation medicine. Each year, after the conference, they will held exams for the registered candidates. While we gathered around, there came Junpei, who joked with me, by saying “I saved your life that day man!” (Yes, the pre-conference workshop! LOL!) Then the diploma candidates left the restaurant earlier and so did us couple minutes later to prepare our goods. After our check out stuff done, we hitched an Uber to the town and we were lucky we got a good car(a brand new ford ranger haha!). Stopped at Uwi’s hotel first, to drop our bags. Then we walked around the riverside area. Had lunch, tried some different mall, visited an old and famous coffee shop there, hang out and eating some snack again, enjoyed the riverside view. We were bit unlucky during dinner, heavy rain happen with strong wind. It stop after like an hour, then we could continue dinner, the shopped in souvenir shop. Then we end journey in Kuching that night, as each of us had to fly to Indonesia in the morning with different flights.

great mural YO!

welcome and goodbye!

chill and hangout


Bata does exist in kuching!


Local wisdom!

Gosh..such an emotional journey! To look back in the past, how I could joined this conference again..to experience this ambiance again..I just glad and happy to say that, “ I did it again!” and I’m very excited for the next conference. I’m very excited too if I could start to aim the diploma in the next couple years..

Dear lord, please lead me to the way..and thank you for all of these opportunities…

High appreciation to the ASCM’s board (especially the wonder woman Alice!), the local organizer (they organized a flawless conference dude!), and thank you KFGB for funded me to this event!



A year old Gemi

21 Nov

Well I haven’t complete my promise yet to continue my stories after that post and that post. Well, busy as always, advance reports, conference report and work were so much robbed my time. Not to mention how my activities at home with baby and house stuff. Sometime I just overslept in my night activity, but then a week ago, I took a holiday with wife and baby and my parents in law to Bandung. It’s just a usual family trip, but my brother in law also had his graduation (congrats anyway), I got an invitation for a talk in vet school of Padjadjaran University and accidentally it also our daughter’s birthday! Yeyeyeye…

Well yes you’re right, I don’t have any intention to continue my latest post. I just wanted to talk about my baby girl, Gemifaly Bonirezar Wanakalani, a.k.a. Gemi who turned 1 year old on this 16 November. Yeyeyeyeyeyey!

Well you can read how the day went when she was born at this.

IMG_20161117_020707The fact that she’s already 1 year old now. We thank to God that she’s healthy, cute and sweet. Her body weight was just 2,55 kg’s at birth. Now she reaches 7,5 kg. Not an average number of baby in her age, yes she’s smaller. But then the normal body weight ratio of 1 year old baby is 3 times of their birth body weight, so my baby still in normal shape. She doesn’t looked skinny, she has a chubby cheek, bit fluffy belly and she looked tall actually. And I am glad for it, because some parents want their children looked fat, they assume that fat is healthy. Well we are different, since we, her parents had an overweight condition and we don’t want that happen to our daughter. Though sometime we were bit panic when her monthly weight gain slowly crawl, especially after the 4th month. A nurse around our neighborhood did judge that Gemi is a malnutrition baby. Well she got her mom’s milk exclusively. Into 6 months old, she already eat many various things as complete diet. Her doctor never worried with the bodyweight issue too. But some people are judgmental, include your close family.


As parent’s consequences, both of us tried to give the best to Gemi. Love, extra care, exclusive breastfed, healthy complementary nutrition, vaccine, parents time, good neighborhood. We agreed to share roles in our domestic stuff, include taking care Gemi for some occasions, although I can’t provide her as same as her mother. I cook, I clean, I wash the dish, do the laundry. For Gemi? I change her diapers, I bath her, wash her clothes, I play with her, I carry her to sleep, I feed her complementary food too. I’m happy with that. Well the main reason is, we don’t trust outsider, any outsider, so we don’t have any reason to waste more money for babysitter. We want spend more time with our baby, no matter how busy I am. I also want to learn and emphasize my wife activities with Gemi. A mother is the hardest job ever!

Well my wife is so excited for sure with Gemi, but it’s too exhausted to manage everything by herself and that’s what happen to the other moms when they don’t get a serious supports from their spouse or family. Lucky my wife can handle the stress. She was an active wildlife vet, now she stay at home. She had experiences in captive orangutans, so she made a good record of Gemi such as, body weight, nutrition, daily activity, medical records. So I guess she uses the energy very well to cope the stresses, beside Gemi’s smile and laugh are great endorphin for us.

We did remember how our early moment with the newly born Gemi. Sleepless, baby cries until late night or even early morning, yet each of us have other activity though the baby not so easy during the day, then the night come, the cycle starts again. We were just like zombie. I have to deal with that in the same time with the working activities. Sometime we were desperate when Gemi cries the whole time and we couldn’t find what the problem is, no matter how much things we tried to fix, then some random person just saying a random stupid things like they know everything about our daughter. That made us pissed for sure, especially when the things are just random thought without any clear logical sense. So we survived little by little by those situations. Invent some tricks and improvisation to control the baby, but sometime as the time goes on, it didn’t work anymore. The older baby could make some job easier while the other are harder. Especially when they started to crawl and active, we must keep our eye before bad things happen like a baby try to eat a stone outside the house,  baby playing plate and fragile stuff in the rack, baby play around the stove and other hot stuff or a baby almost went in to the water closet. Thrilling isn’t it?!

We survived those moments by making ourself keep health. It will be a disaster if one of us got sick.  So we choose to eat properly. Then we get fat together happily ever after as the consequence.  ha!

We both often laugh to see Gemi’s pictures, she changed a lot since a day old and we could note the differences within a month. Yet she’s a lovely baby girl. A year just a short moment, but it felt quite long moment too. We tried to deal with happiness, but sometime we couldn’t. With all the happiness, sorrow and obstacles, we always hope that we could witness her until adult, just like what our parents got until now. Embrace…

She’s our hope for better world in the future…


International Seminar “Primate Behavior, Biomedicine and Neurosciences Research for Promoting Better Health”

9 Nov


Sorry for the late sequel of my latest post.. I was busy to work my report and it’s not finished yet!

So couple months ago (yes, couple months ago!!), at 14 August 2017, we, IAR Indonesia, as a client of Primate Research Center IPB, got an invitation to participate in their event. It’s an International Seminar at IPB International Convention Center, Bogor. The seminar was about “Primate Behavior, Biomedicine and Neurosciences Research for Promoting Better Health”.


Then we offer the opportunity to our staff, as long as they could make any presentations for the event, at least the poster presentation. Then respond came from our staffs in Animal Care Management, the macaques team. They would like to make a presentation about their recent activity in enrichment making. So in 2016, our keeper attended a workshop of captive non-human primate’s enrichment and tried to apply and upgrade our enrichment management after the event. They made some various enrichment in one enclosure in order of 1 thematic idea, thus we called it thematic enrichment (although it is similar to environmental enrichment actually).  Then these guys tried to overview how’s the animal going on in with in the new enrichment by taking behavioral data. Those activities would be documented and reported in a paper, to be presented as poster in the event. The enrichment done, the data sampling done, data analyzing done, result and conclusion done. But then we just realized that we need to make the paper, the scientific paper and the poster too!!! And it’s about animal behavior, not just veterinary medicine stuff!!! We were fucked up for this since the deadline almost there! So yeah, I studied something new, beyond my knowledge…It’s not just about quoting the references, but you need to understand how things works in that discipline….gosh it was killing me! Lucky I could finish the paper right on time, though I wasn’t sure too about it (for sure, I never sure!). Just 2 or 3 weeks left before we finished the poster too.. The fact that the one who would present it is the keeper’s representation. Juli would be the presenter. She was a former macaque’s keeper who now analyze the whole behavioral data statistically. And do you know what her educational background is? Only a junior high school graduate. And there’s a great story behind that, a story that will make you embarrassed when you don’t have any motivation to be better even you have so many chances and opportunities.

Anyway, back to the main event, we had another problem, this was an international seminar. So we had to prepare and practice the presentation in English really good. But then this would be a second time for Juli, so we had a good start there. As for the poster designer looked promising also..


And then the  D-day came!



Great topics, nice talks from the keynote speakers. Especially the one from Professor Randall C. Kyes. He talked about human-macaque conflict survey in Java Island. Well I was hoping that this could be something good to start to manage all of the conflicts in Indonesia, together.

Then the poster presentation time started after lunch, while I was busy to eat and bit late to accompany my team. But they did handle it very good, as they tried hard to explain the poster in English and mixed with Bahasa. Then I also helped them to bridge their communication with the participants and we did it! We finished the presentation quite smooth, as our poster looked catchy too.




Just a couple moment before the closing, the committee announced the best presentation, oral and poster. Out of nowhere, we got called for the 2nd place of best poster presentation!! Wohooooo!!!


I was satisfy and proud with our works for sure..To be honest, it’s a stressful time but also challenging to learn something new..  it made me a bit interested in animal welfare study :p


5 Nov

Dear people,

How’s life? Sucks for sure, no matter how much happiness come..

Well I’m kind a lost myself within myself… stop to write anything even though there were so many things inside my brain. My laptop got broken due the unstable electricity and burned the circuit, this made me less productive..


(I couldn’t get my laptop’s image, but this was also heartbreaking )

Then I skipped some happy moment that I couldn’t mention one by one..Bit memorable was my childhood friend gave me a cute birthday’s gift: She jumped out from the 26th (floor of the building and died. Nice huh?bunuh-diri_20160111_092102 (well i couldn’t find any better picture of her)

Works seems also so stressful when you can’t finish so many things, the fact that you have 2 hours of additional stressful time just for the travel.

(surgeries…and i got hit by a damn minibus)

Then some cutie peaches awaits you at home. Try to compensate with the whole family stuff but then you got exhausted earlier and need to sleep earlier in addition to awake earlier.


For the last couple months, tasks and deadlines really thrilled me.. I have to stay alive to work some papers for couple different conferences. I’m just glad I can stay alive, get fat and complete those works!

In August, I completed the paper for poster presentation in a primate conference. Yet the topic was about behavior and I was so frustrated to work something that beyond my knowledge. Yet the paper done, the poster done and the presentation went great by our team! We got the 2nd best poster presentation dude!


And for another paper.. This was so much emotional for me.. The ASCM conference. I skipped the event for the last 4 years. Well actually on 2014, I sent my paper and accepted, but then I got very ill and failed to participate. Then things changed a lot for 4 years. You have to pay first to complete the registration and paper submitting. But I couldn’t get any funding when I don’t present something in the conference. Luckily the committee allow me to submit the paper after I filled the manual registration. Yet I have to revise my paper before it really accepted. The letter of acceptance itself was late to reach me.. Yes I was accepted for the oral presentation. I applied the funding and it just confirmed nearly the d-day! But, yess….I could go to Kuching for the conference!!


Beside those papers and works… i got to arrange things to support student’s event toO..and it’s always related with fundings!


So this is at least things that I can write so far to ease my writer’s bollock (I mean block) ..  Anyway, actually I may have to title this post as “run for your writer’s block”

I decided to tell the details of those two stories in two additional post. Soon… after i finished my conference’s report